Waking up this morning went a little like this:
You know when you wake up, and you just don’t want to get up? No? Never had this happen?
Then you are missing out.
Uh... I'm sure, he stubbed his toe or something
It’s awesome feeling! To be so tired, that you just want to rollover and ignore the world. It can’t just be me. No it is? You get up at the crack of dawn (Hawaii Time) and have more accomplished in the next three hours than the average, normal person? And, you just cured runny noses while you were eating breakfast?
So, I woke up. [ Up at the crack a-lackin dawn baby! ] And, began to put the weight of the world on my shoulders again.
Since, my brain was still firing on a low voltage, I wasn’t all there. But, that didn’t stop me from trying to delve into the worlds problems.
I’ve almost figured out how to turn oxygen into carbon dioxide… W00t!
Clearly a Tuesday morning deserves nothing less than to have heavy thoughts on my mind. But what I wanted to think about never made it. As I wasn’t fully conscious. The world decided to bring me back to the realm of conscious, in a way that only a trained eye would observe. I should have realized that locating the closet when I was bleary eyed and tired, was only going to cause chaos and pain… And, oh did I say pain already? Unfortunately, I wasn’t observant, and my trained eye… well it was half closed and it still needed some extra training.
[ Didn't I take an online course for that?! ]
So I didn’t get to learn anything valuable from the situation, except maybe… hmmm, well, nope. I’ve got nothin’. After cursing at what I thought was some stars… I believe I was moving on. Trying to ignore the pain..
[ Ignorance is sweet, sweet bliss ]
Or at least I tried. Which all led to a moment that almost took away my man-card.
What’s this? Is this pain?
When I wrapped my Yaris around the tree it hurt less. Well maybe not, but my body was in shock, and pain meds where in affect before consciousness. My brain, was trying to tell me something…
AHHHH!!!!! My brain just registered… ARGGGHHH! The door hit me in the eyebrow. The one that was just healing from the…
Oh, the freaking pain!
And then there was knock at the door. Oh crap, it’s them! They are going to take my man-card away. I’m not crying! Go away.
Sir, we know your about too cry, and you’ve been a pansy lately. So you need to open up and hand it over.
But I wrapped a car around a tree, and those weren’t tears. It was fluids! And, and I just hit the last bruise from the wreck, with this stupid door. It really, really hurts!
Sir…
No! Go away. I’m not crying!
Sir. We know your eyes are watering. Just let it go, get out that good cry.
Fine! Take it away. See if I care.
We are not going to ask again. Your pansy Men’s Wearhouse card is not your man-card.
Dude, I’m fine, I’m over it. It’s all better. See, it’s all good.
…
Fine, give me a sec and I will give…
I wonder if they realize that I sneaked out the window.
Yeah, I had one of those morning exactly today. Got up so late, couldn’t even shower (I know, really gross!) Not my best day. Fortunately, I don’t have to worry about them coming after me for my man card, but I do have to worry about freaking the kids out. Kids always freak out when Moms dissolve in tears. Must be strong for kids…must be strong for kids…must me strong for kids…
Yeah these kinds of days, you just wished that you could start over. I spent the next couple of hours with a pounding headache. My friend Tylenol and I were hanging out together all day.
Can I get do-over?
Here is to today. May it start out much better.
“I’ve almost figured out how to turn oxygen into carbon dioxide… W00t!”
I will still be laughing over this in an hour. I hope your day got better from here!
P.S. I don’t know why but for some reason I usually can’t click on the text boxes to enter a comment. I have to click “reply” to a previous comment and then it MIGHT let me type. Bugger. What am I doing wrong here?!!
It went fairly well. My forehead pretty much stung for the rest of the day. But it could of been worse.
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